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MPs & Tarts

 

July 2004

Howard in Isleworth, Middx. United Kingdom

 
 

MPs & Tarts Party  Most people have heard of, and many have attended Tramps & Tarts or Vicars & Tarts Parties; at least they have if they're English. At the time of my 30th birthday a number of members of parliament had been in the news having been caught spreading their affections more liberally than should have been the case and one had been keeping his affections all to himself, but had died before having the chance to remove his lingerie, hosiery and citrus fruit. To celebrate my birthday, I arranged a MPs & Tarts Party, but one of my friends asked if he could come as a Confederate Cavalry officer, so it became a MPs & Tarts/Uniforms Party.  The theme allowed boring people to wear suits and come as MPs, while others could let their minds go wild. Vicky stuck cotton wool to her head and came as her local MP, who was known for his ill-fitting white hair, while Chris wore brown shoes, stuffed a cushion up his shirt and came as the then Chancellor of the Exchequer, Kenneth Clarke.  As agreed, David came as a Confederate Cavalry officer, while Kevin and Bridget came in school uniform.  Big Mick wore a Monk's habit as it was the only costume in the hire shop that fitted. After a few drinks, we played Pass the Parcel, but with a difference.  Under each layer of paper was a forfeit to be performed by the person who'd removed that layer. Cathy, smartly dressed in a velvet LBD, had convinced herself that the prize would be something worthwhile. Shortly after she'd seen people pretending to be a dog, swapping clothes and eating cold baked beans from a bowl with their hands tied behind their backs, she suddenly remembered she needed to touch up her make-up and disappeared for ten minutes.

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